Confusion?

Someone once told me to " Breathe and Believe" Believe that God is in control and that he alone can take care of me and the chaos that surrounds me. Breathe and believe? I find breathing harder by the minute and I wont lie, I am struggling to believe that God even sees me, hears my prayers and I often wonder if he even cares. I am not sure that I can make it to the base of this GINORMOUS, mountain that God has set in front of me, much less be able to even start the climb. I feel as if I am alone in this overwhelming mess. Yet I still pray, but what is prayer without faith? I don't even know if God cares to hear me anymore. I have failed Him in every way one can fail Him. I am not worthy of His love, His mercy, His forgiveness, yet the bible tells me that He will love, forgive and have mercy upon me IF I believe in Him. And I do, I do believe in Him, I know He came to save us from this sinful world, but I also doubt that He hears me, sees me, and cares? Does that make me an unbeliever, or just human? How do I say that I believe in our Lord and Savior, yet I doubt His Love for me, His mercy? I am in a struggle for my life. For my sanity. I am angry and hurt. I am lost and confused. I am broken.

Can U hear me Lord? Do you know my hurt? Do you care? Are you angry with me? What did I do to make you isolate me? Did I do this to myself? Can you hear me?